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CSUDH - Habermas - UWP

California State University, Dominguez Hills
University of Wisconsin, Parkside
Soka University Japan - Transcend Art and Peace
Created: April 29, 2002
Latest Update: April 29, 2002
jeannecurran@habermas.org
takata@uwp.edu

Talking about The Roman Catholic Church and Trust
Discussion continued on Enlarging the Circle of Pain and Understanding.

Copyright: Jeanne Curran and Susan R. Takata and Individaul Authors, April 2002.
"Fair use" encouraged.

On Friday, April 26, 002, Jolene wrote:

We discussed last night in our SOC class about priests molesting/abusing children. It leaves a sick feeling in my stomach. I think that they all need to "come out of the closet" if they are gay and that's why they chose that profession. They need to be convicted of their crime and pay the penalty for their actions just like all the other molesters do (when they are caught). I don't think the church ought to keep it hidden (Mahony) and allow them to continue to work with children (or teen-age girls if they are heterosexual). These men aren't leading spritual lives. If they were, they wouldn't be taking advantage of children and using them for their own pleasure. I think there's a big difference between religion and spirituality.<,br> Jolene

And just a little later on Friday, April 26, Jolene corrected:

Jeanne, I needed to clarify something regarding sex abuse and the church. I didn't mean that Gay celebrate priests should be victimized by the church or that Gay men should be kept from becoming priests if that is their calling. Sometimes I don't explain things very well. But this was an important issue that I felt needed to be addressed. I appreciate that you replied to my email. Jolene

Meanwhile, back at thr ranch, Mac, at UWP, wrote:

Dear Jeanne,

It's easy to jump onto a popular bandwagon, and I don't fault anyone for giving in to the current tidal wave of media blitz and spin. But whenever I've allowed myself to do that in the past and responded in a singularly emotional manner, I felt as though I'd been caught with venom on my face. So I try to remind myself to slow down, look at the total picture, and THINK, rather than simply respond.

Priests who molest children are vile. No doubt. The violation of any sworn office is treachery, and the abuse of any power is degrading; to the office, to the holder of the office, and most especially to the victim. Whether it's a priest or a president or a parent, the effect is the same; no more, no less. What is easily forgotten in this time of scandal and outrage is that the priesthood encompasses far more good men than bad. Without this acknowledgement, the constant barrage of blame and accusations loses validity. Individual transgression that are allowed to expand until they indict an entire group can be dangerous. Time usually prevails, and relegates hysteria to forgotten history. But not always. At the moment a faithful, practicing Catholic might be viewed as ignorant and uninformed. Tomorrow, the assessment might be more severe.

Jolene said, "I think that they all need to 'come out of the closet' if they are gay and that's why they chose that profession." This seems to assume that gays are automatically pedophiles, and that the only reason they pursued the priesthood was because they're gay. This is an injustice to gays, an injustice to men, and an injustice to the beliefs that are held by a great many people. Gays are accepted into the priesthood of the Catholic Church; the sexual restrictions placed upon gays are identical to the restrictions placed upon heterosexuals. Sexual orientation is not an issue; sexual activity is. Homosexuality no more inhibits the sense of accomplishing "the work of God" than the condition of heterosexuality would do. Therefore, sexual orientation is as irrelevant in the choice of profession within the clergy as it is within any other profession.

Pedophilia is sickening, but the occupation of the pedophile is of no significance. Pediatricians, psychologists, fathers, mothers, aunts, teachers, Boy Scout leaders, babysitters, postmen, lawyers, police officers, social workers...take your pick. If an opportunity is sought, it will eventually be found; a pedophile in search of children will find them. This is the issue. This is what must be addressed. To focus on the Church is to lose sight of the true target. It accomplishes nothing in solving the problem. But to state that pedophiles need to "come out of the closet" only labors the obvious and provides potential victims with nothing more than useless gestures, feel-good rhetoric, and a blind eye turned momentarily in the right direction. What's lost in the cacophony is that the priesthood, like every other organization in the world, is made up of people. The Catholic church is made up of people. And people screw up.

While I am no longer practicing, I was raised Catholic, and have know many priests. Father Kelly, Father Blaney, Father Crow, Father Mason... they were the positive, influential males in my childhood. I've still never met men so kind and honorable as were these simple priests, and I wonder sometimes if it was they who kept me from hating the world. My father is a pedophile, and a violent one. So my memories of priests are made of times like the morning at school when Father Mason sang "When Irish Eyes Are Smiling" to me. I'd been so sad. My father had called me, among other things, a "cunt" and thrown hot coffee in my face not more than an hour before. Father Mason gave me back all that my father had taken away. He replaced the fear and the futility and the bewilderment that was inside of me with hope and love and safety. He was my protector, my champion, and to have him assigned to the pedophile's pigeon-hole is something I will not allow to happen. I could go on and on, with countless examples of good men in the priesthood and all that they did for me and my sisters and brother. Churches are full of good men, as are mosques and synagogues and neighborhoods and schools and Boy Scouts and...but you get my point. Pedophiles should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, because they murder the spirit. If only there were as much energy directed at protecting potential victims as there is presently directed toward the administrative failings and alleged cover-ups of the Catholic Church, something quite wonderful might happen.

Sadly, I believe Jolene speaks for many. When I hear a Catholic comment to a newsperson that they're ashamed of being Catholic because of what has occurred, it breaks my heart. I think of the honorable men and women who've foregone any semblance of what is considered a 'good' life, and are, instead, there to comfort and reassure little girls who have had hot coffee thrown in their faces. I pray that people recognize that the children require advocacy, and that the criminals require justice. The Church requires only time. It's been there in times worse and better than this. It's reformed itself, modernized itself, modified itself, all due to the readjustments necessary to identify, articulate, and perhaps isolate the infinite potential of the human condition. It reflects the times, and deals with whatever it is we present to it at any given moment. But always in it's own good time. It has plenty.

Love and peace,
Mac

On Monday, April 29, 2002, jeanne retrieved the lost file and responded:

This is a great example of a process text, a text that we write as we go, making it available to others, and turning the text into a forum for discussions like this. More about this later. jeanne

Follow up:

To: Mac
From: Jolene

Thanks, Mac. I appreciated your honesty in sharing your life experiences in growing up. You shed some positive light on the subject and made some very good points, especially about the fact that there are many more good than bad priests. Your sharing was so different from our negative discussion last night where I felt too intimidated to respond and just remained silent (one of my many defects of character). I felt so ashamed from where I came from, a Catholic background and I just didn't feel like it was a "safe" place to share. Throughout the years, I have sought counsel with many priests who were comforting and kind. My son had befriended Father Chris before he was transferred to another parish. . . . Father Chris was one priest he connected with and now misses, very much.......perhaps it's time for me to write Father C and thank him for helping to make Sean's day a little brighter. Thanks again, Mac, for your courage and conviction.
Peace,
Jolene

To: Jolene
From:Mac

Jolene,

I'm so glad that you replied and more so, that you too are able to have some positive experiences in the Catholic church to reflect on in such a tumultuous time. I empathize with your situation, knowing that feeling in your gut when someone turns around in light of a heated debate, and says, "You're Catholic, what do you think"? I had to take time to try to understand why I felt so violated in an atmosphere of reckless remarks. Like ourselves, I'm sure Father Chris would appreciate your letter of encouragement.

Thank you for replying so kindly and understanding my poor interpretation to your original letter. Though not YOUR intention, my interpretation was indeed what I've heard so much already, and your letter urged my response. It was still good, although my reply superceded it, to receive your follow-up letter, too. Funny how things work out, isn't it?

Love and peace to both you and Sean.
-mac

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