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CSUDH - Habermas - UWP

California State University, Dominguez Hills
University of Wisconsin, Parkside
Soka University Japan, Transcend Art and Peace
Created: November 29, 2001
Latest Update: November 29, 2001
jeannecurran@habermas.org

I think I'm getting the hang of this narrator stuff. Finally. I keep forgetting that when you're in a novel you can make up anything you want. Now I didn't make up that pink lace bra thing. That really happened. Years and years ago. It's true, I don't remember whether the bra was pink or white or whatever. But it's pink in my imaginary, and pink it stays. White was too traditional, don't you think?

Now, when Marlene came in last night, she hadn't seen, was that Chapter 10? yet, and so I pulled it up on screen to show her the illustration. And right then and there we decided that the pink lace bra should become an art installation. I mean, it's Christmas and there'll be pink lace bras everywhere. And Marlene really understood it as a "signifier" and so did Tyron, and as we thought about it, we realized that each of the bras in the installation should have an iconic phrase to be all its own, its statement. And then we realized what fun it would be to do a "pink bra" conversational analysis. The installation will be 3 dimensional. But, if you want to join our workgroup, you'll need to work on the phrase that will be the icon for your contribution. We'll put the sculpture up in my office. I was hoping we could mount it on the wall so it won't be underfoot. There's so little room in there. Better now that they've opened the Dear Habermas office, but still crowded. Let's go for a wall sculpture. And I absolutely want an interactive sculpture, so we need to be creative about moving parts and things you can take away and add to it. We'll probably print those. But I'll have to teach you block printing, because monoprints won't work for that.

Now, this is not one of those asides where I've just been distracted. I've been very concerned with focus and plot. I just couldn't quite get them to stay in focus. But now I'm getting the hang of it. The genre of novel I'm writing isn't traditional. But who wants to write a traditional novel? This is a postmodern approach.

I started off, see, I remember, with Slubberdegullion and Taradiddle. They're still around. Their characters may be a tad sloppy, but I can never remember who I was modelling them after. Personally, Ribbet's my favorite, but I have an awful time getting him down. He keeps morphing. You know all those Keith Haring morphs? (Link to Morphs under Activities.)Well, that's what he's like. Now how can you build a meaningful character when he keeps morphing like that. Easy. He's a postmodern character. So he can just morph. What do we care?

There weren't any postmodern novels that I remember in the 50s when I was writing. Characters were weird, lascivious, mean, strange, but they didn't morph. That's progress. This is the 21st century. Characters should morph.

Now, what on earth does that have to do with this tale? Well, I just figured out what it's about. And it was a happenstance. I wasn't even planning to write a chapter tonight. It's too cold. And it's too late to turn the heat on. But I came across the outrageous older woman on the Neracar at the Guggenheim Motorcycle Show, and I realized why I identified with that motorsycle. And then I knew that this whole novel was about identity, and about coming to terms with identity, in today's academy. I was going to call it the "Kooky" College Professor, but that's only because the President called me "wacky." It's amazing how these people use pejoratives so freely when you're a member of the State Bar! But if I called it "Kooky" then I'd be accepting their label, and in terms of self esteem we know the dangers in that.

Come to think of it that's a good example of what I call colonization at its most dangerous. By accepting the pejoratives of their dominant discourse (and because it's dominant that makes it mine, too) I'm accepting the disrespect that comes with the pejorative, and even if I turn it back on them, each of those bits of disrespect undermines one's self respect over time. Remember, Kesh and Mary? That's what we were talking about on Thursday.

I didn't know that I wouldn't know what the novel was about until halfway through. But I didn't. And that's comfortable. And this is what a postmodern novel should be like. I mean, I know all that stuff about the disappearing author and that once I write it, it's no longer mine - it belongs to everyone to interpret in interdependence, and all that. But this way I get to interact with it, too. It's just like my painting. While I'm creating it, it's creating itself, and changing what I thought I was saying.

The pink lace bra in chapter 10 was the turning point. I mean, I didn't even know the pink lace bra was a charcter. I thought it was just the bra I remembered. But it assumed a character of its own. Moved right out of the novel and into my office. And whole groups of us recognized it as a character amongst us. That's why conversational analysis came to mind.

Now, this is the novel I wanted to write in the fifties. . . .

To be continued.

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Word Count:

xxxx words. Former word count: 18420. Total word count: 18420 + xxxx = xxxxx